Thursday, July 28, 2005


Here's Sebastien, Arthur's dog. I was trying to get him to pose. Its nearly impossible to get a dog this huge to do so. At least he was curious about the camera, and at least I can get him to lay down. Now I need to leave this room... I have to figure out the wierd smell. I hate having to do that.

Discussion on God

The comments from the last post have reminded me of someone that I have missed talking to since the end of this semester. I worked with this guy last fall and we would argue all the time. I loved arguing with him so much that I made a point of meeting him every Wednesday last semester. Majority of the time we were discussing religion. He, like my father, was an atheist of sorts...

A discussion that went on for the majority of the semester started in the office between us and one other that we worked with. This friend asked both of us to describe God. The other guy in the office started off. He had trouble with this one. He stated that God was something that was omnipotent and indescribable. That was not good enough for my friend. He did not think that you could cop-out with stating that God was indescribable. I let them go on for awhile. I usually like listening to others argue. Then the other left.

My friend asked me to describe God. Whenever I think of God, I think of the holy trinity. The three persons. So, he stated, you think that God as the same as the Church? I honestly did not see what was wrong with that. God is over us and yes, he is omnipotent, but there is also the holy spirit which is with us. It is the part in which we relate to. I asked him what he thought God was.

The reason that I put him as an atheist is because he described God as a group. He put God as an idea that exists exclusively from the beliefs of different groups. He pointed to a group that walked by and stated, look, there is God. I was confused for a little while. I thought that he said that God did not exist, but he disagreed with me on that. He stated that it is fairly obvious that God does exist. Why else would there be war and worship and whatever else is done for the reasons of faith? But he did not put God as an entity that existed away from the group. It was the group that gave God definition. Would there be God if there was no group?

This makes me think of the question: Does a falling tree make a sound if there is no one there to hear it? Obviously there is a sound. And why? Because the tree is not something that is part of our imagination. God is not something of our imagination either. There is a separate entity that exists and that is why there is such an effect on human race. God is not an idea.

Well, you can imagine how the argument went on and on. It still isn't over. Maybe I can pick it up again next semester. Which reminds me, I should be doing work right now...

Wednesday, July 27, 2005

Evil Bible Home...

Came across this not too long ago. It's called the Evil Bible Home. It has this one section of evil bible quotes.

Murderous Fire from Heaven

Then he (King Ahaziah) sent an army captain with fifty soldiers to arrest him (Elijah). They found him sitting on top of a hill. The captain said to him, "Man of God, the king has commanded you to come along with us." But Elijah replied to the captain, "If I am a man of God, let fire come down from heaven and destroy you and your fifty men!" Then fire fell from heaven and killed them all. So the king sent another captain with fifty men. The captain said to him, "Man of God, the king says that you must come down right away." Elijah replied, "If I am a man of God, let fire come down from heaven and destroy you and your fifty men!" And again the fire of God fell from heaven and killed them all. (2 Kings 1:9-12)

This is new to me... They are saying you should be athiest because God is evil? I thought the emphasis would be on Him not existing. My father always told me that religion was horrible because of all the violence it caused and everything like that, but he at least saw the general benefit of supporting his wife and children going to church(he just argued with us a little along the way). The whole point to life is family and the community. Even with his beliefs he repected the beliefs of my mother. If this is the only life you have and there is nothing after this, why bother being involved with anything going against religion? Why not support those closest to you who go to church if it makes them happy? I think of something that my parents told me when I was little: It is better to be a Christian if there is a God or no God. If there is no God then you simple die and that is it. But if there is a God and you aren't a Christian, then you go to hell. Which one is better?

I know that isn't really the best way of looking at things. I was also told as a child not to put too much into the bible because it was just written by wondering arabs in the desert, or something to that effect. But the point is that there is no real reason to be religionsly against religion, is there? If you are an athiest, wouldn't it be smart to do what you can to make the lives of those around you better and not spout out garbage about the evils of God! That is rediculous! I think it would be better to do what makes you and others happy. It makes me happy to follow the church, so my father leaves me to it. He's not angry with me. He simply tells me that he disagrees. I think he feels a little out numbered in the household in that area. He probably didn't have much say on Matt and I going to church or not when we were little either. If the mother is Catholic, then the children will be Catholic as well:)

Tuesday, July 26, 2005

Change in background again

I'm playing with the background again. I've tryed putting this photo on repeat.

I'm not finished with it yet, but I a, too tired to work on it more at this time. Maybe I'll get it later. Though I should do school work instead of working on this.

We will see. Goodnight for now:)

Monday, July 25, 2005

New links and Tv

I think its about time that I let you guys know that I put up even more links on my 'Blogs to check out' list:

Assassination Press
Nick's Bytes
The Voice of Reason
Turd's Titilating Tidbits

I believe that is it. The list has been growing recently. Pretty cool! Let's see what else...

My summer has been going by slowly as usual. I'm cool with it. I have been learning the pleasure of satellite tv. I am usually very much anti-tv. I get annoyed with people sitting around mindlessly watching television, having those certain shows they have to watch... Its like thier life depends on it. I think that started whenever I got sick of watching all the news channels and then all else there seems to be is reality shows with stupid sitcoms like Dharma and Greg.

Though maybe this is not any better. I had mostly just switched from tv to the computer. But for now, Point Break is on.


Friday, July 15, 2005

Passion and interest

What makes life interesting or boring? I have been wondering that myself since I've been commented on how boring my blog is on another site... I know it was a personal hit because I was also called a bitch.

First I was thinking of simply writing a couple of questions for others to answer, for instance: What is it that makes your life interesting and what is it that makes you happy?

But then, I just have to keep writing...

My personal belief is that there is no life without passion. Right now I am in turmoil because I am trying to find my passion again. I feel like I can't function without that inner drive and a deep inner love for what I do. I'm not sure if others have this problem, but regular work is difficult for me unless there is that drive. How did I get my BA? I have to say that there was no way I could have done it in any other area... Maybe art, but that's beside the point. Passion is what gives my life purpose and has been the root of my happiness.

All of this is derived from God. I would have no passion for art, music, history and philosophy without recieving it through him. So I found reason to have more of a religious bent in my art and through my studies. I have also felt that I need other changes in my life. This results in me trying to cut out most of my drinking and other such things. Not being single anymore has been helpful in this process, but it isn't the reason I've been trying to improve.

So does this make my life boring? I really don't care if it does because it makes me happy. I have been happier recently than I have been in a long time. So I will show you what makes me happy and hope it is of some interest to my viewers along the way.

I mentioned whenever I first started this blog that I am better at conveying my emotions and what I am through my art than through words... I feel that I'm not getting myself across to people with words. There is this barrier with my writing that my drawings and my paintings don't have.

So there will be more art later and whatever else I find interesting at the time... Later:)

Thursday, July 14, 2005

Want to live forever?

I have had an obsession with vampires for years. Not to the point that I would play that wierd vampire card game and try to drink people's blood. Wait I did play that game...

That's besides the point. Back to my "semi-normal" vampire obsession. Yes... I would say that it came from Anne Rice, but I think it started earlier... Or my obsession with monsters in general started at a young age. I remember some of my first drawings were of warewolves. I wonder if I could find any of those...

Warewolves have never been as appealing to me though. Who would want to turn into a wolf every full moon? They appear more torurous than fun. I know, vampires kill people and drink blood, but they live forever. There is a certain appeal with that.

It is also cool to think that someone looking like this...

... Ah, I love Lestat. Anyway, it would be cool to think that someone looking like that could come and seduce you into eternal life with him to live as night creatures that feed on the rest of the idiots of the world...



..... Oh sorry, I was daydreaming. Strange fantasy, right. Maybe not strange, but I am a fanciful idiot sometimes. That reminds me of a dream I had when I was in middle scool.

I dreamed that my band directors were all vampires and chopping off everyone's heads... For some reason John Travolta was with them and he chased me down and I thought he was going to kill me, but instead he started singing "Happy Birthday" to me. It was cool. I woke up wondering, is there a movie of John Travolta as a vampire? I can't think of one, but he'd be a sexy vampire. And also, why was he singing "Happy Birthday" to me? Just another strange dream.

I thought that there was this romantic element to being a vampire. In most horror movies with vampires there is the gorgeous vampire that is searching for his sole mate to spend eternity with... Romantic, but wrong in the same sense.

It is wrong to want that life... Talk about the ultimate betrayal of God. Taking your life to eternal damnation on earth and feeding on the life of all other beings. Pretty wicked.

So here is a question for you: If you found out your soulmate was a vampire, would you wish to stay with them forever or would you believe you take some other form of action? Like would you kill them to save their soul?

Well, I know I'm safe. There's no possibility of Arthur being a vampire. He's passed out behind me as I write. Well, those are simply fantasies of a little girl anyways...

Wednesday, July 13, 2005

Blogging on blogging

I haven't been online since I wrote my last post. It can happen. The computer is not my life (though it is a big chunk of it).

What was hilarious to me was that my mother sent me an email today telling me to make contact and asking if she should call the police. Main reason being: I haven't blogged since friday! Okay, so there is also the fact that she hasn't been able to reach me on my cell (it has bad reception where I'm at), but that is normal for me to not answer the cell for days at a time. I even talked to her on Monday! Maybe she forgot, or me not blogging seemed to be unusual behavior for me as of recent.

What makes this blogging thing so damned addicting? I have encouraged several people to start after I got mine going... For the third time. Though what is it that makes us do it?

I use to hate computers. In highschool I prefered using a type-writter to a computer (unless I was writing papers). Computers had annoyed me since my parents got their first one. I lived in a small town where I was the only one of my friends who had a computer. All they wanted to do was play on it instead of doing other things... Like playing outside or with dolls or whatever the hell else I did as a child. I just didn't want to sit and play those stupid games!

I guess that changed at some point in my college carrer. It was probably when I was working at the library or the news paper and had the damned thing in front of me all the time... And partly because of games such as Diablo 2.

What is sad now is that I hate not having one now. Yes, I wrote earlier that it isn't my life, but I would have posted earlier if I only had access!

Its okay now. I have it in front of me. Everything is fine. I have my fix. Funny... I'm blogging on blogging:)

Friday, July 08, 2005

I wish I was at the beach...

These are pictures from last summer. I was going through my pictures as usual and right now a summer vacation laying out in the sun... It just sounds badass.

Well, this is the best I can do for now. I rarely have any pictures of myself on vacations. I can be a hog with the camera. This is the only one I can find. I'm not at the beach, but I'm on the way there.

This next one shows what I do to amuse myself when I'm there. I love playing in the sand. Yeah, I'm always trying to do some sort of art...

Other than that I have scenic pictures. Everyone else was passed out and hungover at the hotel, so I walked down to take pictures.

This has turned into a semi-photo blog of recent. Well, I will write more later. I'm torn between writing more on the haunted house, actually having a political post or writing about Maronite Catholic Church...

We will see:)

Glass Rose

Your soul is bound to the Glass Rose: The

"My heart lies somewhere between perfection
and dust. And while my soul is a sight to
behold, I shatter at the blink of an

The Glass Rose is associated with perfection,
beauty, and frailty. It is governed by the
goddess Aphrodite and its sign is the Looking
Glass, or Tenuous Love.

As a Glass Rose, you have a beautiful soul and
naturally attract people to you. Love comes
naturally to you, but it hardly ever lasts.
Though you embody the perfect form of love,
your own faults are your own undoing.

What Rose Is Your Soul Bound To?
brought to you by Quizilla

I agree with this one... What kind of coffee are you?

You Are an Irish Coffee

At your best, you are: wild, spontaneous, and outgoing

At your worst, you are: too extreme and reckless

You drink coffee when: you want to keep drinking booze

Your caffeine addiction level: low

Thursday, July 07, 2005

Cartoon of the day...

Tab, The Calgary Sun

The Big House

I have been moving rather slowly today... Partly because I've been sitting infront of the TV most of the morning and partly because I had quit a bit to drink last night(I think I had six beers). That is usual for me if I'm hanging out with my family. Who am I kidding, that is commen while hanging out with almost anyone... Except I change out the beer with gin and tonics sometimes.

But that is besides the point...

My brother and I with our significant others were hanging out at a local bar with my cousin and his wife. They had dropped off their three little girls with another family member and so we stayed up late drinking.

Now I will tell you why I have that ugly pink house at the top of the post. That use to be my grandmothers house. It was white before... I really wish to bye that house again... Just to paint it white again. Pink really is the ugliest color. Anyway, whenever my family is together we usually tell stories of that house. My mom and all her siblings grew up there and several of the cousins (myself included) lived there with grandmother at one point of our lives.

The stories started again last night, mostly for Arthur's enjoyment. We call this house the "big house." This house is also incredibly haunted... No joke! Everyone in my family has a story of seeing ghosts at this house. The place is over 100 years old and has definite cold spots in the room upstairs. Trust me, it is creepy.

Let me tell you one of the stories...

This is of the people who owned the house before my family. My mother and several of my aunts were working on the house (something I remember doing all the time as a child) and an old man came to the door. My family had never seen him before so they asked him what wanted.

The old man said that he wanted to see the place where his brother died one last time before he died. My family was more than happy to hear his story... We always need explanations for why the house is so damned creepy.

We had a bit of land out behind the house and there is this pond back there as well. The old man said that he and his younger brother use to go play back there when he was little(he was 6 or 7 years old and his brother about 4 years old). One day they decided to go out on the pond in a tub. I don't remember what happened to the tub, but something made it sink. The old man said that he made it to the side alright, but his little brother drowned. After that happened, his family moved away. That was the first time he had been to the house since.

I can say that this explained alot. For instance, the ghost of a laughing little boy running around in the back sometimes(scared the crap out of one of my uncles one time). The tub in the pond... Well, I was confused why it was there.

After the old man told his story he left and that was the last time my family saw him.

Well, that is just one of the stories. I tell this one because I am fairly positive it is true. I'm not sure about all of them. I mean I come from an Irish Catholic family that loves nothing more than to drink and tell ghost stories. Ah... It makes me miss the place. There is nothing cooler as a child than growing up in a haunted house.

I guess I've written enough for now. Maybe I'll tell more later if you wish, or I could move on to another subject... Later!

Wednesday, July 06, 2005

My new links to art blogs!

A couple of art blogs to check out...

"Lipservice" by Erica Voges (acrylic)

I have her linked on my sidebar. Check out her site, Erica's Art. Her stuff is beautiful!

The next one...

"Icarus", collage w/ encaustic, beeswax, and feathers on fabric over wood, 7" x 17", 2005

This is from Lucky Devil. I especially like this one of his! Check his site out too. It should be on the sidebar soon:)

I believe that is all for me today. I am going on the drive to San Marcos...


Cartoon of the day...

Leif Zetterling, Sweden

Small chapel in Round Rock, Tx

I loved this little chapel:) Again I don't feel like writing... So here are some more pictures from this weekend...

Till next time:)

Tuesday, July 05, 2005

Cartoon of the day...

Sergio Langer, Clarin, Buenos Aires, Argentina

My 4th of July

I am too tired to write tonight, so I will write tomarrow. Hope everyone had a great holiday:)

Sunday, July 03, 2005

Flower pictures

Went on a little tour of Brenham today with my mom and Arthur. Like any small town, almost everything is closed on Sundays. So what I have are some neat pictures of flowers! Yes, the greenhouse and rose garden was all that was open... And then there are the pictures of wildflowers thrown in as well.

First off here I am at the greenhouse.

Arthur at the same place.

One good shot of orchids....

More flowers. I'm not sure what they are.

Even more....

Now for the bluebells(wild flowers)....

That's it for now. I'll write later:)

Saturday, July 02, 2005

The Artist

I just really liked this description...
Art is not a science, nor is it voodoo. It's more like alchemy. It contains precious and vulgar elements from several spheres, and affects so many others. And stepping outside the cold clinical realm so far portrayed in this analogy, it comes from and returns to heart and mind and perception and experience at the same time. I’m very conscious of what I’m doing when I do it, as glazed as my eyes may appear. I thrive on the potent magic I encounter when the create drug kicks in, and I’ve become quite addicted to it. Being the sorcerer’s apprentice is a great job.

This is from Lucky Devil. Check it out:)