Sunday, March 20, 2005

A little girl in my dreams

I always pay attention to dreams. They can tell so much of what is going on in your life. Things you might miss. Maybe I get too much into the interpretation of dreams, but I think I have good enough reason behind that.

Since I can remember I have had constant nightmares. My mom blames it on the old black and white Sci-fi movies my dad watched all the time when I was little. Could be. I don't know of anything terrible that happened to me as a child, and so maybe that is it.

When I was in elementary school I started to make fun of my dreams. I didn't want them to scare me anymore... Though I am still scared of the dark. I always treat horror movies the same way. I find them amusing. I never really want them to scare me, though I am usually impressed if they do. But I'm getting off topic.

Now it isn't the grotesque images of dead people that disturb me as much in dreams(I know that may sound demented). For instance, the dream I am having recently. I dream that I am in a hotel... it is different every time. The constant is that there is this little girl trying to ask for my help. One time she said she was dehydrated... but I noticed scars all over her body. Another time she was saying that someone was trying to kill her... but she ended up being the killer. The girl trys to get close to me and I get the feeling of complete terror. She looks so innocent and sweet... but there is something about getting too close to her that scares me to the point that I jerk awake in fear.

I only slept for two or three hours this morning because of this. It only started a few days ago, but its being repetitive. Well, hopefully she won't show up tonight.

So how do I interpret this? I do not know. If it gets to me too much I'll try to see if I can find anything in Jung, or ask my parents. They can be good at dream interpretation sometimes.

I think I've written enough on this subject. Now I will go back to the couch and read, maybe. Honestly my mind has been too distracted today... Maybe I'll write why tommarow. I'll give you an idea though. It involves a good looking, bad ass guitarist... don't know his name. The gyst of it is, I don't understand men. Nothing new.



Jessica said...

Who understands men or dreams? They both show up randomely and disappear randomely and make no sense at times! That was funny how Greg didn't tell you the dude's name. We should go see them again next weekend if we have time. They are playing at Lucky's again I think. That guitarist you like is hella hot and talented. Usually I'd go for the guitarist but you two seem to fit perfectly. Like when he kissed your cheek and kept coming up to you. You almost looked like a couple!

el said...

Thanks... I hope he still likes me. I feel like an ass that on the third time I see him I'm going to have to find out his name. Why is it that any guy I get involved with I forget thier names, but even the guys that you aren't interested in I can remember them? I think that I need to be a little bit more sober next time. You know, so I won't "take advantage" of him again:)

Jessica said...

That's hilarious! I never even saw yall makin' out that 1st night. I was too distracted talking to the lead singer about the technical aspects of the band's set-ups and shit. Also I was trying to calm Jeremy down.

el said...

I'm not sure anyone saw us makin' out... maybe Dave did. Doesn't matter now. I think I am doomed to have losers like Dan hit on me for the rest of my life.

"Hey pretty lady, What are you doin'?" (with the hardcore drunkenness to his voice)

Ahh... maybe I'll have better luck next weekend:)

Jessica said...

David definately saw you two makin out! He was pissed the entire night after that. He didn't even barely say a word to me and Jeremy after that point. But he is over it now for sure. He admits he overreacted.

el said...

I had an idea that he'd be mad, but I really didn't care at the time. I'm sure that was a bitch thing to do. I didn't want to compromise my fun for his comfort. I felt like it was done earlier in the trip... I knew it would happen. Doesn't matter now though.